The Flight From Hell
Yes we arrived in South Africa safely, but man, was it a harrowing journey.
We set off from Auckland on Thai airlines at 3:30pm on Friday morning. The 12 hour flight from Auckland to Bangkok was uneventful but obviously long. The Crew were a little less friendly than other airlines, but nothing to write home about - which is strange, because I suppose I am doing that right now. Never mind.
The in-flight entertainment was great. Nice big touch sensitive screens with movies you could pause and rewind whenever you wanted, which was great.
We arrived in Thailand at about 9pm local time. The temperature outside was 23C which was find for that time of night I suppose. The airport is massive. We walked for 15min before we saw shops and stuff. It took us a while to orient ourselves to the new currency, which worked out at about 25 to 1, so for anything you have to divide by 25 to get the New Zealand equivalent price. Try doing that after a 12 hour flight. Thank goodness Leanne�s PDA was handy.
After a few hours shopping in over priced duty free shops, we stepped back on the plain to South Africa. The take off went fine although it was about 15 min later than scheduled, but as we started climbing it became apparent that something wasn't quite right. We heard a thud from under the plan, and then a second thud a little later. After a while we forgot about it until another thud. The plain wasn't flying right and people started getting concerned. The flight attendants were nowhere to be seen, which didn't help matters. A short while later the captains voice came over the intercom saying that there was a problem landing gear and we would have to land back at Thailand after dumping the fuel in the ocean.
So, for two hours we circled over the ocean feeding the fish thousands of dollars of hard fought for fuel while we contemplated whether we would land safely or not with faulty gear. Its amazing what goes through your head at times like that. Its also amazing how quickly you get to know your fellow passengers as you share a common life threatening experience. You soon find out that the people you could die with, aren't that bad after all.
Finally we said our prayers and made our final approached hoping that those wheels would stay firmly beneath us. The wheels touched down softly as the pilot made his best effort at a sooth landing, we all cheered and clapped as the plane came slowly to a stop. Out the window I could see the fire tricks headlights on waiting to pull out if the worst happened.
We sat in the plain for about 15min before the pilot finally announced that we would be taking our next flight at 11:30am the next day. Great! Now what? Well, although some mechanic might have been a bit sparing on the Q-20 (CRC/WD-40 or whatever), the airline staff sure made up for it. They waved all through the airport to buses which were already waiting for us and whisked us off to a flash hotel to sleep for a few hours and have breakfast before catching our flight. How nice of them.
Riding through the streets of Bangkok at 3am is really quite interesting, especially when you have the song stuck in your head. Although this wasn't exactly one night, it was the better part of the morning, but I suppose it didn't quite work with the tune. The roads from the airport are wide and new, but every few hundred meters was some statue to some Thai god or other. Miniature temples were here and there among the houses which were generally some what derelict. For the most part the place reminded me a lot of Chatsworth in Durban, just a lot bigger.
We got into hour hotel room and settled in for about 2 hours of precious sleep. For me it was like drinking from an oasis, I woke up feeling much better. We went down to breakfast and had dinner with a South African couple from the room next door to us. We spoke about all kinds of thing, but rugby was high on the list, of course.
At 8:30am we checked out and sat on the steps waiting for the buses to arrive. Seems they were stuck in Thai traffic. Again, the hotel and airport start were great and started handing bottles of water out and glasses of ice water.
The Thai people have this really cute way of greeting you. They bow slightly but put their hands in the prayer position and touch their noses with the tip of their fingers. I don't know why but it reminds me of a mouse eating cheese or something.
Eventually our buses arrived and we were all ready to leave for the airport, when a heavy set lady came rushing from the back of the bus shouting at the driver, 'Eeeh, we cant leave now, theeh are still two paas-enjahs having break fast.' Sure enough, two men were disturbed from their leisurely breakfast to be inconvenienced by a flight home. They were only 1 hour late.
Thai traffic is far more interesting during the day than at 3am. There are lots more cars bikes and buses to observe. Traffic rules are optional, and driving on the left is encouraged, but not practised by all depending on the traffic. There are heaps of bikes, mostly scooters and 100cc two strokes. The bikes have special privileges, as they get to ride on side walks, between cars, in front of buses over traffic islands, you name it. You think that an accident could happen at any time, but everyone seams aware of everyone around them and makes room or hoots to get noticed. It somehow works.
After an Iced Moca and ice cream from Dairy Queen, we hopped back onto the plane back to South Africa. This time all went well and we landed in JHB international - that's right I did say international - airport at around 5:30pm SA time. We had to catch the 7pm flight to Durban, so we moved quickly through the airport to try find the domestic departure gates.
As we walked I notice the airport was extremely grotty. It was mostly under construction and was decked out in dark wood panelling. It reminded me of a really old school building from the 60ies. Man I hate that place. In the rush a black guy asked us if we were heading to the domestic terminals, we said yes, and he grabbed the handle of Leanne�s bag and said follow me before we had a chance. On any other day we would have seen this scam a mile off, but give us a break, we have been out of the country for more than 5 years. I could smell the familiar smell of alcohol which has been sweated through human skin and dried, and left for a few days, but I though to myself, at least this guy knows where he is going.
As we walked we went though car parks and construction cones towards the domestic counters, he kept asking Leanne where we were from, Leanne didn't give away much but he somehow concluded that we were 'English' so we stuck with his story. We stopped off and I though I might give him a small tip. We didn't have Rands so I offered him some Thai Bart. He said 'No, 50 English'. Me and Leanne laughed and I said, 'How about New Zealand dollars?'. I only had a five dollar note which I tried to hand him, but he said, 'No, that doesn't wek, do you have English?' 'No, that's all I have' 'No, 20 US?' 'Listen mate, you have a choice, you take some Bart or some NZ$ or nothing' 'No it doesn't wek.' But he took the $5 and pushed off. Both I and Leanne were ready to slap him, thinking we were dumb enough to offer him 50 pounds for 10min work. If I see him again when I leave I am going to ask him form my change from the $5.
Well, he did get us to the correct terminal so we joined another lady from Maritzburg who was flying from Sydney with her two young kids. Another guy had tried to ripper her off for $20 Aussie, but she was clued up and had some small change.
Time was running out and we had to book our luggage in so we joined the relatively short queue to check in our luggage for the 7pm flight. We chatted with some other passengers from our flight for a while then realized we were not moving. The staff taking the luggage were taking their sweet time about it. �African Time� is the scientific term of it. It was so frustrating watching the incompetence in full motion.
Eventually got in front of an attendant, but we knew it was too late and we had missed the 7pm flight, so he said to us that we were on Standby for the 9pm flight to Durban, which was the last flight of the day as the flight was fully booked already.
We took our hand luggage through to the gate hoping to find someone to take it up with further, but there wasn't anyone helpful around at that time of night, so we resigned ourselves to waiting and seeing.
Half an hour before the flight the SAA staff arrived. I rushed to the front of the cue and the lady said politely, 'Sorry Sir, I have to let through all the booked passengers first, then if you come once everyone is booked in we can see if there is a seat for you.' So, again, we did what we did best, waited. Nearly everyone was booked in, so we went up to her again with some other passengers on stand by and stood by. We put some pressure on her and she called upstairs a few times then eventually said that she had some seats for us. Oh the relief. Once we got on the plane we found that there were plenty of free seats - typical.
The last flight to Durban went quickly and it was so nice to see God had provided a lightning display around Durban which looked spectacular for the air, it was a nice end to our journey.
I tried to estimate the amount of time we were in transit. Our flight would have taken 12h + 3h + 11h = 26 hours if everything went smoothly. Because of all the delays it ended up taking 26h + 14h = 40hours. Hello! That�s a working week!
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